i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
