My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
