I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Randomize
