But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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