Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
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