he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
