i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize
