Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
