Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
