honey bunches of taint.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
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