You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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