Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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