WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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