did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
