just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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