i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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