Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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