i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
