you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
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