That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
then he tried to convert me to islam
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
