You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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