i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
She swung at the pinata with crutches
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
