member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
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