meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Randomize
