think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
