Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
