Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
