so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
