hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
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