Pants 0. Shit 1.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
