Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
