Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
