omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize