id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
my poor anus
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
