He is such a slut. More and more my type.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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