i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize