I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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