We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
