Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
