She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize