how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
