why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
