If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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