I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
