Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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