It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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