It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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