what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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