awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize