Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
There r osticjed everywhere
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I need a beard to bite.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
