By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
