Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
